The 8:30 News Sponsored By Mountain Dew
by Me Gots No Name
Summary: Written specifically for those who liked my other fic involving Mountain Dew. Cowritten by my good friend Tiffany. PG for slight language & where the tea was spilled...


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The 8:30 News Sponsored By Mountain Dew  
  
By Me Gots No Name & Tiffany  
  
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Disclaimer: I don't own anything.  
  
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Author's Note: Rose is not from LoD.  
  
That's Tiffany's MSN name. & Belinda  
  
is my younger sister.  
  
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Never give out your password or credit card number in an instant message conversation.  
  
Rose says:  
  
Whats Up!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
hello!  
  
Rose says:  
  
The silence was killing me  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
didja read da reviews for my lod/mountain dew ficcy?  
  
Rose says:  
  
no, I'm watchin a anime on the net  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
some1 thinks their dr. pepper stream is better than our mountain dew streams!!!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Grr, leme at em!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
i wuz thinkin' we could double up & write a mountain dew ficcy 2gether (my fans demanded another chapter)  
  
Rose says:  
  
I can sure try, but i have a BAD case of writer's block  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
once we get rollin', it'll b cool. u just watch.  
  
Rose says:  
  
allright then!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
no time like da present 2 start  
  
Rose says:  
  
True, verry true!  
  
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This is where the fanfic actually starts.  
  
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Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Me Gots No Name here with the local 8:30 Fanfic News. This news show is sponsored by our eternal inspiration & lifestream, Mountain Dew. I'm here with local Mountain Dew drinker, Rose, to see what she has to say to those who think Mountain Dew streams aren't as good as Dr. Pepper streams.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: Get off that poor person's case.  
  
Aura: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Personaly, I think Moutain Dew is better than any carbonated prune juice!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Well said, Rose. Well said.  
  
Belinda: What about my root beer stream & my cream soda blood cells?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
I'll admit, they're Pepsi products, but none can stand up to the almighty glory that is Mountain Dew...  
  
Rose says:  
  
Amen to that!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
I'd also like to bring in someone else on this subject of Mountain Dew: Dart*, who was a dummy~dumb stupid head & tried to steal my Mountain Dew!!!!!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: ... ... ...  
  
Rose says:  
  
He tried to steal Moutain dew?! That Ninny, ninny poopy head**!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Amen to that, but my servant, Xellos***, took care of him, right, Dart?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Dart: The pain... The pain...  
  
Rose says:  
  
Well, he did what was necessary, and you probably deserved it!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos: Thanks for saying that. That logical King Albert guy said I was too hard on him.  
  
Rose says:  
  
What does he know anyways?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Albert: I know it's not logical for people to just teleport into a room.  
  
Rose says:  
  
That is Perfectly logical!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Yes, but you just mysteriously entered the room.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
You weren't here a second ago.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
One might even say...  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
...you teleported in?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Albert: I couldn't have! The logicness!!!!! Waitaminute! "Logicness" isn't a word!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
& wait a minute isn't spelled like that.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Albert: AHHHHH!!!!! I'M LOSING IT!!!!! I'M LOSING IT!!!!! BOOKS! BOOKS! I NEED BOOKS!!!!!  
  
Rose says:  
  
You don't need books, you need a doctor, and Moutain Dew!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
No, he just needs the Mountain Dew...  
  
Rose says:  
  
Yeah, I guess you are right.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
...& maybe Emille.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Albert: Emille? Logic bring can she me to.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Great. He's gone dyslexic...  
  
Rose says:  
  
All I can say is, What is he gonna do next?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Why, he & Emille are gonna get some Mountain Dew.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Then we're calling Charter.  
  
Rose says:  
  
Yeah! Sounds like a plan to me!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Dart: We've been meaning to send Albert to Charter for a long time.  
  
Xellos: Now you see what a genius Aura~sama is.  
  
Dart: AHHH!!!!! Don't hurt me!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos: Oh, come on, it didn't hurt that much last time.  
  
Dart: It burns! It burns!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Rail: Hey, what's up?  
  
Belinda: Since Aura's evil servant is Xellos, Rail is mine.  
  
Rose says:  
  
I don't have a evil servant....  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
We can get you one at the Evil Servant Discount Dollar Store****.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
They also sell Mountain Dew there.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: Freak.  
  
Rose says:  
  
Sweet!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Rail: I'm not evil. I'm misunderstood.  
  
Rose says:  
  
Yeah, that's what they all say  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos: I'm not evil. I'm misunder... aw, what the hell, I'm evil.  
  
Rose says:  
  
See what I mean?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Rail: I REALLY AM!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Right...  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Nina: Officer Rail? I brought you some tea-Rail: NOOOOOOOO!!!!! GET AWAY!!!!!!!!! THE EVIL TEA!!!!!!!!!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Cid (From FFVII): *Smacks Rail* You're not worthy to drink tea, you *&^&(*^(*&&^. I'll take some, miss!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Rail: No man! Stop! You don't know what you're doing!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
(But it was too late...)  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Cid: AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! *^(^()*&*&^)*^&%*^(&^$^%#(&%&^%#$*^%#%$@&^$&^$@#^%(&$*^$*(&%(&%&%^&*$^*$^#%@ $#!#$^$%(*&^)*^&_&_&+^)*%^&^$^%#$%#@%$@%$(&%)*^&^$^%#$%#$#!$#^%$&^%&*^(*&_)+ &(*^&^%^#^%$#%@$!$#^%*&%  
  
Rose says:  
  
Whoah!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
They really should invest in Mountain Dew.  
  
Rose says:  
  
Yep.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: Whoa... She burned Cid's-Aura: Belinda!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Rail: He is never gonna have kids...  
  
Rose says:  
  
You mean he planed to get married?!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Rail: No, I mean he can never have kids...  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
He should know, right Rail?  
  
Rail: ... ... ...  
  
Rose says:  
  
I think so... But I'm not Rail.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Lucky you.  
  
Cid: (Who's finally recovered from it) That %&^&$ burnt off my-Aura: Cid!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Good lord Cid, calm down!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Cid: But she burnt off my-Aura: Do you have to say it? I wanna keep this a little clean...  
  
Rose says:  
  
But still, chill man!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Cid: You don't understand the pain I'm feeling! & you never will! (Crying)  
  
Rail: Cid's right! None of you will ever know the pain we know! (Crying)  
  
Rose says:  
  
... ... ...  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Kain: This is the saddest thing I've ever seen.  
  
Rail: Where'd you come from?  
  
Kain: Followed Nina. *Sip*  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
*twitch*  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Kain? Is that a can of Mountain Dew?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Kain: Huh? *looks at can* Oh, yeah. It is...  
  
Rose says:  
  
Did someone steal a can of Moutain Dew?!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: Oh great. Now Rose & Aura are gonna kill you.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Kain: Who's gonna kill me?  
  
Rose says:  
  
Me....  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: & you were cute... (Crying)  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Kain, I'm giving you a 5 nanosecond head start.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Kain: Huh?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Too late! C'mon, Rose! Let's rush'em!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Allright!  
  
Rose says:  
  
I'll follow your lead!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Kain: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Runs off screaming & drops Mountain Dew*  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: I didn't think he'd run off so quickly.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
I think it has something to do with the huge golden dragon glaring behind us...  
  
Rose says:  
  
Nani?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Filia: XELLOS!!!!!!! I'LL GET YOU FOR STEALING MY MOUNTAIN DEW, NAMAGOMI*****!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
What's goin' on, Xellos?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos: Well, you know your never~ending supply of Mountain Dew?  
  
Yeah...  
  
Rose says:  
  
Good lord-a-mighty!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos: *Points at Filia* That's where it comes from.  
  
Belinda: Ewwww...  
  
Xellos: Not from there! From her fridge!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: Okay, this is getting freaky...  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos, I'm glad that you were able to keep me stocked with Mountain Dew, but never, NEVER, are you to steal it from people who actually DRINK it, especially golden dragons who hold grudges against you!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos: You mean she actually drinks Mountain Dew?  
  
Belinda: I thought she drinks tea...  
  
Cid + Rail: (Anguished wail)  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
I drink tea, too, but I drink Mountain Dew more!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Same thing with Filia.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Everyone: Ohhhh....  
  
Rose says:  
  
I Only drink tea on weekends...  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: AHH! I forgot about my tea! *Runs off.*  
  
Cid + Rail: (More anguished wailing)  
  
Oh, suck it up, you big babies!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Filia: XELLOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Now look here you two crybabies, there is nothing to be crying about.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
We nearly forgot about her...  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Cid + Rail: How would you know?!?  
  
Rose says:  
  
If you don't stop crying... I will personaly make your life a living hell *Death Glare*  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos: So Aura~sama, what're we gonna do about Fi~chan?  
  
Whaddaya mean "we"? You're the one who got her so damn pissed in the first place.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Cid + Rail: ... ... ... (Stunned look)  
  
Rose says:  
  
That's better.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos: You want me to take care of Fi~chan?  
  
Yeah, just don't make her too mad. She's running outta buildings to step on.  
  
Filia: XELLOS! COME HERE & FACE ME!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Have fun.  
  
Rose says:  
  
And don't go getting yourself killed.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos: Of course not, Rose.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
There he goes, trying to be suave again...  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: *Sipping tea*  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Cid + Rail: (Still stunned)  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
I think you stunned them...  
  
Rose says:  
  
Okay you two, straighten up A.S.A.P. Or, you can't have any tea for the rest of your life!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Cid: Yes, ma'am! *Salutes*  
  
Rail: Okay, but I don't want Nina spilling it anymore.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Cid: Exactly! You gotta do something about her! She can't just go around spilling tea on men like that!  
  
Rose says:  
  
*Sigh* and what do you want ME to do about it?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Nina: I promise I won't spill tea on either of you anymore! *Accidentally spills tank of live lobsters****** on the guys.*  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: I think what we want you to do is get the lobsters off of them...  
  
Rose says:  
  
*Snaps fingers* I know! I'll get Auron to get rid of the Lobsters!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Auron: ... ...  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Is it just me, or is this room getting crowded?  
  
Rose says:  
  
Just a wee bit.  
  
Rose says:  
  
So, who do we kick out?!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: Might as well let him. You can always trust FF guys, right, Cid?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Let's see: Kain left, Albert's with Emille, Dart just kinda went away...but I think Xellos & Filia are taking up too much room.  
  
Rose says:  
  
Hey! I know who I can get to be my evil servant!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: Seymour?  
  
Rose says:  
  
Good Yevon No! Not the 'guado' man!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Keep him away!!!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: Hmmm...  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
To think, Belinda thought you were gonna get Mr. Bat Crap.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: I didn't think that, I just thought it'd be a possibility. *Does little anime finger dealy.*  
  
Rose says:  
  
It is Wakka!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Belinda: Wakka's evil?!? DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE!!!!!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Wakka: I'm not evil!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Well, I think that takes care of the 8:30 News for tonight. Join us tomorrow, when our topic will be Evil Servants: Are They Really Evil Or Just Misunderstood.  
  
Rose says:  
  
Wakka: I just owe Rose a lot of favors, ya.  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Rail: I'm misunderstood, but I don't know about the freak with the purple hair...  
  
Rose says:  
  
Hey now! Leave Mr. Xellos alone!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Well, that wraps it up. I'm Me Gots No Name & I gotta do my History homework!  
  
Belinda: & I gotta buy a CD!  
  
Bye! G'nite!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Ja ne!  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Xellos: Thank you for standing up for me, Rose.  
  
Filia: XELLOS!  
  
Xellos: I swear, I have to buy her a dictionary.  
  
Rose says:  
  
Nani?  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
Don't worry about it. G'bye!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Allright  
  
Me Gots No Name says:  
  
'k bye!  
  
Rose says:  
  
Bye bye!  
  
*See "An LoD Ficcy About My Mountain Dew"  
  
**Quote from Nall in Lunar SSSC  
  
***Xellos is my servant. Don't you wish you were me?  
  
****Where Belinda & I bought Rail & Xellos. For all you evil servant needs.  
  
*****If the namagomi I know at school is reading this, I'm not telling you what it means.  
  
******Don't ask me where she got the tank of live lobsters.  
  
*****  
  
End.  
  
***** 


End file.
